6 Steps to Successfully Debating (Not Killing) Ideas

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Once you’ve spent all that time listening to and clarifying an idea — getting it really clear in your own mind and making it easy for others to understand — it’s tempting to feel like you’re done. Not so fast! The point of spending all that time in clarification mode was just to get the idea ready for a debate.

If you skip the debate phase, you’ll make worse decisions, you’ll be unable to persuade everyone who needs to implement, and you’ll ultimately slow down or grind to a halt.

Once again, you as the manager don’t have to be in every debate — in fact, you shouldn’t be. But you’ve got to make sure that they happen, and that there is a culture of debate on your team.

When Steve Jobs was a kid, his neighbor showed him a rock tumbler — a can that spun on a motor. The neighbor asked Steve to gather up some ordinary rocks from the yard. He took the stones, threw them into the can, added some grit, turned on the motor, and, over the racket, asked Steve to come back two days later.

When Steve returned to the noisy clatter of the garage, the neighbor turned off the contraption and Steve was astounded to see how the ordinary rocks had become beautiful polished stones. Steve would later say that when a team debated, both the ideas and the people came out more beautiful — results well worth all the friction and noise.

Your job as a boss is to turn on that “rock tumbler.” Too many bosses think their role is to turn it off — to avoid all the friction by simply making a decision and sparing the team the pain of debate. It’s not. Debating takes time and requires emotional energy. But lack of debate saps a team of more time and emotional energy in the long run.

1. Keep debating focused on ideas, not egos

Make sure that individual egos and self-interest don’t get in the way of an objective quest for the best answer. Nothing is a bigger time-sucker or blocker to getting it right than ego. On a broad level, this means intervening when you start to sense that people are thinking, “I’m going to win this argument,” or “my idea versus your idea.” Redirect them to focus on the facts; don’t allow people to attribute ownership to ideas, and don’t get hijacked by how others might feel.

If you have to, set ground rules at the beginning of the meeting, or — if your team would find it amusing and useful — put a prop like an “ego coat check” outside the door.

Another way to help people search for the best answer instead of seeking ego validation is to make them switch roles. If a person has been arguing for A, ask them to start arguing for B. When people know that they will be asked to argue another person’s point, they will naturally listen more attentively.

2. Create an obligation to dissent

I once interned at McKinsey for a summer, and what impressed me most about the company was its ability to spur productive debate. How did they do it? McKinsey had very consciously created an “obligation to dissent.” If everyone around the table agreed, that was a red flag. Somebody had to take up the dissenting voice. This simple prop was surprisingly effective.

3. Pause for emotion/exhaustion

There are times when people are just too tired or emotionally charged up to engage in productive debate. It’s crucial to be aware of these moments because they rarely lead to good outcomes. Your job is to intervene and call a time-out.

If you don’t, people will make a decision so that they can go home.

4. Use humor and have fun

The spirit with which a debate is launched often determines the tenor of what follows. I have found that people on a team I lead key off my mood to an almost alarming extent; when I find a way to have fun with a debate, others often follow suit.

5. Be clear when the debating will end

One of the reasons that people find debate stressful is that often half the room expects a decision at the end of the meeting and the other half wants to keep arguing. One way to avoid this tension is to separate debate meetings and decision meetings.

6. Don’t grab a decision just because debating has gotten painful

It’s tempting to end debates and make a decision too soon when a debate becomes too painful. At times like this, people often look to the boss to end the suffering and make a decision. The right thing to do would have been to set a “decide by” date, so everybody would know that they couldn’t lobby endlessly.

Key Questions Covered

Why is the debate phase so important in the Get Stuff Done (GSD) Wheel? Skipping the debate phase leads to worse decisions, makes it harder to persuade the people who need to implement the idea, and ultimately slows your team down.

How do I keep debates focused on ideas rather than egos?
Redirect people away from "my idea vs. your idea" thinking back to the shared goal: finding the best answer as a team.

What does 'obligation to dissent' mean and how do I create it on my team?
An obligation to dissent means that if everyone in the room agrees too quickly, that’s a red flag — not a victory.

How do I know when to pause a debate instead of pushing through?
Watch for signs of emotional exhaustion — when people are too tired or emotionally charged to think clearly, debate stops being productive.

How do I prevent debates from going on forever without a resolution?
Two tactics help here: separate debate meetings from decision meetings so people know which mode they're in, and assign a "decide by" date to each item being debated.

What's the risk of ending a debate early just to relieve the tension?
Grabbing a decision prematurely can undermine trust and set the team back further than the debate itself would have.